The perfect essay

I wrote a perfect essay for my How to Read Images class. It is "immpeccable" notes the lecturer her graded it however she also believes that I downloaded it from somewhere on the internet and did not write it myself. I had to visit her in her office hours to find out my grade (unlike everyone else in the class). 

She sat there saying: "it's so perfect, impeccable..but without a doubt not right...perhaps plagirised *pauses so that I have time to confess that I in fact did download it from some unknown source*...it was perfect, I was so surprised how perfect it was....not a bad surprise...but not too good either. I didn't expect such a good essay from anyone in my class...*another dramatic waiting for Helen's confession pause"

Me: Well, I dunno what you're getting at but I wrote the entire thing by myself and quite frankly I'm highly insulted that you have such little faith in me as a student

Lecturer: *concerned faced* oh no I had full faith in you..

Me: to plagirise my essay...wonderful. I followed your instructions for the essay as I wasn't too sure to go about it.

Lecturer: *face lights up like she's been awarded a prize* You followed my instructions, I knew they''d be helpful to my students

Me: Even the ones who pladgirised?

Lecturer: *realising that she is fighting a battle she is about to lose* you're such a pleasure to teach, I know I've said it to you before but there's no harm in repeating it. Now for your grade, 1.0 (the perfect grade in German Uni). But, I feel as though you didn't do so well in your mid-term

Me: We didn't have a midterm

Lecturer: Did you do a presentation?

Me: Yes. 

Lecturer: Oh good, hmmm I don't think it was as good as the essay so for the course I'll give you 1.3. But the essay is still perfect.

Me: Oh I know

Lecturer: Good, I hope you will pop into me and we can have a little chat about how you're getting on or anyhting you like, that'd be nice. 

Me: I highly doubt that *exeunt*

I loathe that woman.